Thursday, 29 November 2012

Injured Pigeon

Jared:

(I love opening shifts on Mondays, they are so easy. Only 5 stores are open) *Beep* Customer Service Jared speaking.

Non-Customer:

Hi, I found an injured pigeon and I am trying to find it a home. Can you transfer me to the store in Ft. McMurray please?

Jared:

Ummm, this is a pizza company.

Non-Customer:

Yes I know that. Please put me through to the store.

Jared:

(WTF!?!) I can't they don't take calls, that is why we have a call.... for pizza, not pigeons.

Non-Customer:

Sigh, the reason why I want to talk to the store is because a guy named Jack works there and he raises birds.

Jared:

(How the hell do I get these weird calls!) I can pass a message along for you.

Non-Customer:

Are you going to e-mail or call? Cause I don't want to sit here all day with an injured bird!

Jared:

(I hope this bird shits in her eye!) I am sorry but I don't normally deal with pigeons! So I call the first store. "Hi it's Jared from customer service. Do you have an employee named Jack who raises birds?" Store responds with "Stop wasting my fucking time!" *Click* I call the next store and say the same thing. He responds with "Jared, are you seriously that bored?" "No, no I am not" I respond. "This crazy lady called, saying she has an injured pigeon and she is looking for some guy named Jack who raises birds." He says "you sure get some strange calls." In a bitter tone I respond with "I know I do"So I call her back.

I called the stores, they don't have anyone by the name of Jack who raises birds.

Non-Customer:

What the hell am I going to do with an injured pigeon????

Jared:

I don't freaking know, this isn't a pigeon hotline!! I'm hanging up now!



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