I'm Fucking Agitated

Jared:

La la la, I hate all customers, I want to kick them all in the junk, la la la. *Beep*

Customer Service Jared speaking, how can I help you today?

Mr. Agitated:

Yeah, hi! I ordered a pizza, like a week ago and you tried to kill me.

Jared:

(Damn it didn't work)

Oh I am so sorry sir, what happened?

Mr. Agitated:

I ordered a double pepperoni pizza and it came with mushrooms! I am deathly allergic! DEATHLY!!

Jared:

You don't need to yell, chill out.

Mr. Agitated:

So anyways I called that night and I was told I could have a replacement next time.

Jared:

We only do replacements the same night. We would have offered you a credit. How much did we tell you we would credit?

Mr. Agitated:

Um, I guess the full amount, yeah that's it.

Jared:

WRONG! We would have offered you half off your next order. Also there is no record of you calling back to complain.

Mr. Agitated:

Ugh! This is fucking bullshit!

Jared:

Sir, I would appreciate it if you could remain professional and not use profanity. (I love saying that, it makes them so mad tee hee)

Mr. Agitated:

I'm the customer damn it! I can talk how I fucking want to! I'm getting fucking agitated! I'm fucking agitated man.

Jared:

On the caller ID it says your are calling from a religious place. I don't think God likes you talking like that.

Mr. Agitated:

What the fuck did you say to me??

Jared:

I have to go now, tee hee.

Mr. Agitated:

Don't you dare fucking hang up on me!

*Click*