Thursday, 6 December 2012

Old Crusty Cinnamon Bun

Jared:

Ugh I hate working till 2 am on a Monday. All the crazies call... 

Customer service Jared speaking.

Whack Job:

Hi I ordered pizza 2 hours ago and it hasn't shown up.

Jared:

I'm sorry about that, what phone number is the order under?

Whack Job:

It's under the hotel phone number. 555-5555. My name is Layla.

Jared:

There is a note here saying there was no answer on delivery.

Whack Job:

That's crazy, I was here the entire time. I'm staying in a hotel, studying for my nursing exam. I drank 2 cups of coffee, I feel funny. 

Jared:

Ummm okay, but the point is you didn't answer the door.

Whack Job:

He didn't show up, he probably stole the food and ate it.

Jared:

I really doubt he did that. I am sure the store gives him free food.

Whack Job:

I'm all jittery from this coffee, I need to eat, where's my food.

Jared:

You ordered two hours ago, so probably in the garbage. Can I ask why you waited 2 hours to call?

Whack Job:

I was drinking coffee and studying. I didn't realize the time.

Jared:

Did you want to place another order?

Whack Job:

I want it for freeeeeeeee!

Jared:

Nooooooooo, you will pay! You didn't answer the door.

Whack Job:

Your driver totally stole the food. My brother used to work at KFC. He would steal the food and make KFC Stew.

Jared:

Ummm okay.

Whack Job:

It was really good.

Jared:

Ummmm okay. So anyways, did you want to place another order, that you will pay for?

Whack Job:

I know he didn't show up because the front desk guy told me he would keep an eye out for the driver, and he says he never came. He's not allowed to leave the front desk.

Jared:

What if he has to go to the bathroom?

Whack Job:

Nope, he can't leave.

Jared:

Mmmhmm. Anyways do you want to place another order or not??

Whack Job:

He checked the security tapes and he said he didn't come.

Jared:

If he isn't allowed to leave the front desk, why would he check the security tapes?

Whack Job:

Ah, I don't know, he just did.

Jared:

Mmmhmm. I am going to ask you one last time. DO....YOU....WANT....TO....PLACE...ANOTHER....ORDER???

Whack Job:

I had to eat an old crusty cinnamon bun! It's all your fault!

Jared:

(WTF, somebody punch me in the balls please) 

Ummm what?? What does that have to do with this?

Whack Job:

I was starving and feeling funny from the coffee, so the front desk guy went into the back and he gave me his old crusty cinnamon bun, so I wouldn't starve.
Jared:

Umm, I thought he couldn't leave the front desk??

Whack Job:

That was the only time, so that is why he had to check the security tapes.

Jared:

Mmmhmm! So anyways, I am going to hang up now.

Whack Job:

But I need foooood! I feel weird from my coffee.

Jared:

Maybe the front desk, has an old slice of pizza laying around. Bye! 

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